Astute readers will have noticed that several selections from my new book of poetry have been making the rounds in the media lately. My poem Where's the Newspaper? I Need To Drop a Deuce recently appeared in the New York Times, and my poem Watch Me Light A Ten Foot High Fart, You Filthy Bitches ran in the September issue of Harpers. Those of you interested in discovering further selections from my vast, brilliant ouvre are welcome to check out my current collection of poetry, out now through Random House:

Update: Due to overwhelming interest to my agent and publisher, I've relented to present a selection from this sure to be award-winning collection.

Enjoy:

My Soul

I look at a piece of rotten meat
And think about my soul
How like my soul is this piece of rotten meat
You know, probably

A robin alights upon my porch
I wonder, does a bird have a soul?
This could be the case
But I’ll bet it’s not much like my soul

Can a robin’s soul fathom the depths of my yearning?
Can a robin’s soul ride on the churning ocean of my conflicted passions?
I’m betting it’s more along the lines of thinking about grubs, and where to find them

Whoops
There goes the robin
I think it saw a cat

and what terriblegloriousyearning acherumbles through my heart
for you, my little turtle nipple
my lovely cuddly little bear
my sweety-beety bookums

Honey, let's make us some sex noise.

I hope you enjoyed that as much as I did. I really enjoyed that. Moved, I think is the word.